Yesterday I was smacked in the face hard. So hard in fact, I spent most of the day tearing up or even crying. Well not even just crying, I bawled my eyes out twice. I'm tearing up again right now as I write this.
I'm not a crier and I HATE crying. It's nothing about weakness, I believe it's a control issue. lol
Why am I here on this site? Why did I start a firefighter wife site?
I only have one answer for that and it's the truth.
I'm selfish and it makes me feel good
I'm not kidding, but let me explain.
I was born with a “tell me your life story” birthmark across my forehead. Until I learned to embrace it, it was the most annoying thing ever. Can you imagine being at the grocery store without your little one's for once and strangers just want to chat with you? So many times I wanted to scream, GO AWAY, this is my ME time. Considering I've always worked with the public in some fashion and enjoyed it, this is a gift I wasn't aware others didn't have. Firefighter has the same thing happen to him so you can see how we'd think it's just normal.
It didn't take long in 2012 for my FireWife friends around the world to start hitting me up and come back. But I wasn't in a good space to do that. I know how much work and time it all takes. I know groups can suck the life out of you if you let them. I especially know that I can spend 24/7 on a group I love and not get any work accomplished. I knew I wasn't up for the work and that was why I had left to begin with.
But now I've been reminded why I'm here and what my purpose for this site is.
Reconnecting with friends
While I stayed in touch with a few of my past FireWife friends, over the last 14 months I had forgotten just how many friends I had around the world. It does my heart good to be able to chat any hour of the day or night and know that someone is on our group to respond in seconds. Even better is that I know if I'm not around, the group is taking care of each other. It's become self-sustainable from all of those “old” friendships that have been reconnected.
So many new friends
My old friends had made many connections in those 14 months I stepped away. As such our group grew quickly with like minded women. We get along well and many of us hav e a completely inappropriate sense of humor. After just 2 months, these new friends feel like old friends. It's just comfortable.
The Selfish Part
I get a lot of emails and fb messages thanking me for getting everything rolling again. I appreciate the thank yous, but it's the sentences after the thank yous that melt my heart.
I love hearing that it's helped them through a specific situation, a day of loneliness because that 72 hour shift was just a lot this time, or just a more generic IT'S SO MUCH FUN to connect. All of this in just over 2 months. These sentences after the thank you, are a big part of my selfish why.
I crave to hear more stories of how wives connected through the group, page or site and became friends.
While I get selfish pleasure out of hearing the stories, I won't apologize even once for my selfishness. Bring on more stories ladies and feel free to make me cry any time 🙂
What's the story with the fortune cookie in the picture? It's karma or kismet or some other thing. I ended up with this fortune cookie not long after I decided to start Wife Behind the Fire. For a super generic fortune, it sure was timely.
I hope you will share your experiences with me. I mean, look at that fortune cookie. You can't argue with that right?
This gave me chills… without you, I would have never met Trina and without Trina… none of this would have happened. So your why is pretty worthwhile, even if it is selfish! 🙂 Love you.
Love ya back lady. It’s pretty crazy that we’ve only “known” each other for a few months. When things are meant to be, they are meant to be.
I love this. LOVE it!! 🙂
Holly R says
PERFECT!!!! This is why I love the FB group and I love this site! You all have been so welcoming and we share the events of our lives, our struggles and encourage each other….this is what true sisterhood is….I feel so blessed to have you all in my life…even if you are not here in Ohio, I know that I can depend on one of my firewife sisters to be there, whatever hour I need to talk or get advice. So if it is selfish of you Val….. we love you for what you have done in bringing all of us together. Let’s raise our glass to…. FW Sisterhood!!!
Cheers, with my boring glass of water lol I’m very happy that everyone has kept the group a great place to hang out by balancing the good and the bad.
Kristy Harvey says
Just one word… Tears 🙂
Glad I won’t be crying alone lol
Virginia Lee says
I love that you were “selfish” enough to start this group! I love the stories, too! I, too, thought maybe Beth and Trina had known each other before hand and this just blows my mind! I love when the sisterhood of being a fire wife just shines through like that! I have definitely found my home in groups, here. I still belong to a couple of other groups, but this one is the one where I spend the majority of my online time. I love you ladies!! I’m glad and proud to have you as my sisters!!! <3
Everyone gabs so much you can’t help but spend the majority of your time at our group 😉 It’s too much work to catch back up, so you just stay there all day rofl
I’m glad you are enjoying the group and also glad you found us.
No, just recently got stuck with her. But, she’s MFD family, so now I am REALLLLLLLY stuck with her!
Ohmuhgosh, will you all quit being girls. I am busying dealing with my hard-a$$ class and you guys on here gushing. We are family and that is what family does. No gushing. That is why all you ladies mobilized and got books into my classroom. That is why I picked up the phone and said find out why Capt. Gutzmann is not on there. It is why there are carpools with the fire family next door. Family does what needs to be done to take care of family.
Now, considering I was the boat rocker that ended up being the final straw and got Val moving on WBF. I get to say thank you for shutting up your squeaky wheel. So your selfishness was just to shut me up. I get it. 😀
Yeah, your crappy post about the books didn’t help me lady! I cried about that too. F’me I’m teared up again. I swear I’m not pmsing! I’m going to blame it on this stupid diet and the fact I haven’t had wine in over 10 days. Yep, that’s the problem, my wine stores have been depleted.
True, so now the selfishness is all on you Trina. I just washed my hands of it lol
Good! Then everyone can stop gushing because then I am just like everyone else! 😀
I LOVE THIS!!! This is what the “sisterhood” is all about……oooh gave me chills 😉
I totally love this 🙂
I have to admit, I spend most of my Facebook time in WBF and WBF Getting Healthy. I love the group, I don’t feel like I’m on eggshells, and I feel like you ladies are my own personal cheering squad. Had a bad day? We’ll all line up to kick someone’s butt. Ex being a jerk? We’ll offer to come with shovels and flashlights. Having health issues? We’ll commiserate, offer advice, and push you to get the care you need/deserve. Having a fabulous day? We’ll celebrate with you. And all of that is why I love the group.
Glad you are comfy on both the groups. I spend the majority of my fb time there as well. That says a lot considering how many fanpages I have there. lol It’s too fun to chat 🙂