firewife summit ptsd

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Choose Happy

Whining about all the crap that we have no control over ruins relationships and makes you miserable for so many reason. There are things in the FireLife we can't change, but we sure can take a different approach to how those things affect us.


How we choose to live this life is up to us. Instantly download the free Never Alone ebook now and get tips for being happier every day.

firewife never fights alone

I support FireWives truthfully.

You can’t pour from an empty cup. Make sure your needs are met to better meet theirs.


Check out the latest posts:

Have you ever thought about how it would feel to be able to achieve anything you want during your lifetime?

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A funny thing happened when I gave up on date nights. I didn’t miss them. 

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I heard a rumor that there was an opening at one of the local, well known, flight programs.

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Val Selby

Empowerment Coach

About Me

I've been the queen of pity parties and all they did was make me a miserable person. I was so focused on everyone else for years that I thought of self-care as being selfish. Generations of FireWives doing everything alone and not passing on what they've learned has made many bitter wives out there. Time for that to change.


It's time for those of us in the latter years of the service to share what we've learned and the younger generation to help us see how times are changing right this moment. Join me as we make great changes in how our spouses work and how we deal with it all.

I wish I had found you when I was a young firewife with a bunch of kids, running around like a crazy person because he was gone so often.?

Instead I found you later and rather than helping me navigate those early years you helped me come to terms with the last years of his career.

Dawn H.

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I'm thankful for the workshops Val Selby puts on. She's really helped me think things through and make some real changes in my life. I'm calmer and happier and things are definitely looking up.

Laurie S.

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